Tomorrow

Tomorrow I go to my first outpatient appointment. I am nervous and excited at the same time. I don't know if I want to get better but I could at least try. I hope to meet some very nice people and learn a lot. Today hasn't gone so well. I don't know what to expect. I hope my friend has a good start on her journey to recovery.

Addiction

How and Why Did I find Pro Ana / Mia websites and videos? I have to admit I don't wach them as often as I used to. I shouldn't be looking at them at all. I know a lot of the photos have been photoshopped but I still think it's possible to look like them. I often think I wish I had the legs like these girls ( lone, lean , and toned. I also watch thnspo videos youtube. It is a bad habit that I need to break
but sometimes I watch recovery videos . I don't know if I can stay away from these pics and videos :/

Getting Back to me !!

I'm really nervous about starting this blog but I think it will help me and others. I want to get back to the happy, confident, optimistic person I used to be. I decided to start this blog while talking to a few friends on Yahoo Messenger. I feel different, out of place, depressed, and alone. I am struggling with a few mental illnesses. <---- That was hard to say. I have an eating disorder and I also deal with anxiety and depression. I want to help people like me. Tonight i haven't been optimistic but I just got the strength from God to want to get better and help others.
This blog is for quite a few people first I need to do this for myself. This is also for the ladies on livejournal and for anyone else who needs to get better !

Getting Back to Me............